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When I found out I was pregnant with my first child, I was in the midst of working on a paper about racial disparities in maternal health. Throughout my own pregnancy, my research allowed me to see the experience through a new lens that included reflecting on my own privilege as a white woman.

In their report, “Racial/Ethnic Disparities in Pregnancy-Related Deaths — United States, 2007–2016,” the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention states that Black mothers in the United States are three to four times as likely to die from a pregnancy-related cause than white women. One of the many reasons for this is the long-term impact of chronic stress, as reported by The New York Times Magazine in the article “Why America’s Black Mothers and Babies Are in a Life-or-Death Crisis”.

In my own preparation for childbirth, I became fascinated with the strength of the mind-body connection. Based on “The Fear-Tension-Pain Cycle,” the more that negative stimuli produce fear and tension, the more pain and complications women experience.

As a white woman, I experienced some stresses: moving to a different state close to my due date, listening to other people’s horror stories about birth, and general anxiety about what was to come. But none of these stresses were inflicted on me solely because of the color of my skin, which is a level of privilege many women do not have.

As illustrated in an NPR story titled, “Black Mothers Keep Dying After Giving Birth,” Black women consistently report being treated with bias and having their pain minimized in the healthcare system. This leads to heightened stress at the very time when they ought to be relaxing and receiving care to improve their health. A lifetime of experiencing racism takes a physical toll on a Black woman’s body, leading to health issues like hypertension and pre-eclampsia. As her body becomes accustomed to feeling threatened, the resulting stress is detrimental to healthy birth outcomes.

Because of this maternal health crisis, the lives of both mothers and their babies are at risk. Catholic Social Teaching emphasizes that societies must put the needs of their most vulnerable members first, and in order to address the crisis, we must give a “preferential option” for Black mothers.

Here are three ideas for how we can get started in creating a more equitable system that affirms the lives of Black women and their babies:

1. Call your representatives and advocate for the passage of the Black Maternal Health Momnibus Act of 2021.

There is currently a bill in Congress that hopes to address aspects of the maternal health disparity. A few elements of the legislation are investing in social determinants of health (housing, transportation, nutrition), growing and diversifying the perinatal workforce, and providing funding to community-based organizations that are working to improve maternal health. Congress.gov allows you to see what action has been taken on the bill and look up your representatives so you can contact them and ask them to support it.

2. Donate to organizations that support Black mothers.

One of the organizations that has signed on in support of the above bill is Abide Women’s Health Services, an organization run by Black women and based out of Dallas, TX. Their goals include reducing infant and maternal mortality rates and increasing the number of Black midwives and birth workers of color - and their first listed value is being life-affirming. They are a great example of how anti-racism and pro-life advocacy are interconnected.

3.  Use pro-life platforms to educate about racial disparities in maternal health.

Many Catholic parishes and schools have pro-life groups that support pregnant mothers and advocate for life-affirming policies. Yet, in my years of attending Catholic school and being involved in different parishes, I have never heard a discussion of racial disparities in maternal health in these groups. Those who are already involved in pro-life work have a platform and an opportunity to address a serious issue that causes  the deaths of both babies and mothers. This could be as simple as hosting an event to educate others about disparities in maternal health and encourage parishioners to support Black mothers.

I have a bone to pick with networking.

It started early on in my own career. I’ve been a TV reporter for almost eight years and have met thousands of people along the way. I love what I do, but I’ve seen how people treat me differently once they learn what my occupation is and what they could possibly get out of it while “networking.”

When I moved to my current city almost six years ago, I was looking to make friends and meet other young professionals in the area. As an extrovert, I was excited to go to these events, but time after time, the people I tried to talk to didn’t seem interested in carrying on a conversation with just Kara. Once they learned that I was Kara, the TV reporter, they would seemingly get some type of revelation and change their tone.

Now, I couldn’t change how they reacted, but I could do something myself to make sure others I network with didn’t leave feeling the same way. And so, as a Catholic and someone who tries to see the dignity of others, I decided to take a different approach to the thing so many people believe they need to advance their careers: networking.

Here are three tips that I use when trying to connect with others:

1. Connect through passions and interests.

Finding shared interests is one of the easiest ways to begin relationships with others. When I meet new people, I try to find something we’re both interested in. I report on a number of stories, but some of my favorites are stories that can help the community, about issues such as homelessness, hunger, or equity. As a result, I’ve built relationships with people in nonprofits and higher education, as well as those who are actively involved in their community. Being able to bond over shared passions allows us to work together to make our community a better place, and this has helped sustain the relationships over the years because it’s beneficial for all involved.

2. Expand your networking opportunities beyond events.

Networking doesn’t just have to happen at networking events! One of the best places to build relationships is at your own parish. My parish is full of people who are involved in the community, from doctors and teachers, to judges and politicians. We might see the same people at Mass, but sometimes we don’t know what they do for a living. Something as simple as staying after Mass to talk with others can help you meet someone who could become a mentor for you. The relationships I’ve made at my church are some of the strongest and some of my best stories have come from people that I share a pew with on Sunday.

3. Check in with people.

Communication is key in all relationships. While I’m not telling you to text or email your connections every day or week, it’s important to not be present only when you need something. Asking about someone’s family or wishing them a ‘Happy Birthday’ shows people that they matter to you. If you are looking to build relationships instead of networking, you need to be there for others.

Last but not least, remember that the best relationships are not transactional, but rather transformative. We live in a world where people always want something from others, but networking doesn’t just have to be about getting a new job. It can help us learn about different careers and industries, and how to be better employees, friends, and community members.

We can learn how to network better by remembering that behind every business card is someone who is loved. And by building better relationships, we can transform the world into a better, more dignified place.

Once upon a time before the pandemic, Washington, DC was a city bustling with professionals decked in suits and accompanying charisma. Almost every evening, somewhere in the nation’s capital, a professional happy hour drew crowds to listen to honored speakers and meet other professionals. Conversations at these networking events continued during follow-up meetings over coffee or back at the office the following day.

Working from our home offices this past year, we’ve missed out on opportunities to connect with our colleagues in person. Instead, we relied on technology to keep us connected. New York Times best-selling author and leadership expert Dan Schawbel points out that despite its benefits, teleworking can lead to feelings of isolation. Physical isolation from our co-workers presents a challenge when trying to establish relationships. Though seemingly inconsequential, work relationships can impact our attitudes towards our jobs and our work performance. According to a LinkedIn survey, 46% of professionals see a correlation between work friendships and happiness. Relationship-building in the workplace positively impacts work satisfaction, cooperation — and ultimately your output.

So in the coming weeks and months, as employers make plans to bring us safely back to work, how can we make up for that lost human connection when we return?

One way to approach being back in the office is to make a conscious effort to connect with colleagues in a respectful and empathetic way. C.S. Lewis writes in Mere Christianity, “If you could see humanity spread out in time, as God sees it, it would look like one single growing thing - rather like a very complicated tree. Every individual would appear connected with every other.” Indeed, the collective memory of a prolonged pandemic is a thread that will tie us together long after the pandemic is over.

As Catholics and social beings, we are called to strive for human connection - to recognize the bonds that tie us together. Whether you’re getting to know new colleagues or seeing longtime colleagues after months apart, here are a few tips to help you connect as you transition back into an in-person setting:

1. Getting to Know a New Colleague: Start with a simple opener.

This type of question helps break the ice by starting with a simple topic that does not require much thought. It’s a way to acknowledge your colleague’s presence and offer a listening ear.

Example: “How was your commute today?”

2. Catching up with Colleagues: Strive to relate.

In nurturing human connection, we should look for similarities with others. However, even if you find that you do not have similar interests, this question can help you learn more about your colleague.

Example: “Have you picked up any good books or TV shows lately?” or “Did you catch the game this past weekend?”

3. Talking to a Colleague Whose Work Doesn’t Overlap with Yours: Ask about current projects.

Stay up-to-date on the latest projects that your co-workers are undertaking. Doing so can bring fresh ideas to their decision-making process and create an opportunity for you to ask for feedback on your own work.

Example: “Tell me about one of the projects you are working on.”

4. Keeping the Work Relationships Going: Plan to meet in person (while respecting their comfort level).

Throughout the Bible, Jesus shows us the importance of sharing a meal in making human connections. Suggesting an in-person coffee or lunch is a great way to catch up with colleagues, so make sure to introduce the possibility of an in-person meetup if they’re comfortable with this idea.

Example: “Would you like to join us/me for coffee or lunch?”‍

While professionals across the country might not be signing up for a happy hour talk anytime soon, there are small ways that we can restore human connections when we return to the office.

One of my favorite TED talks is by Megan Phelps-Roper, the granddaughter of the founder of the Westboro Baptist Church. The organization has been named a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center, and has made headlines over the years for its hate speech towards LGBTQ and Jewish persons, as well as for its protests at military funerals. Phelps-Roper shares that part of the reason why she left Westboro was her interactions with several strangers on Twitter. Though they passionately opposed Westboro’s doctrines, these Twitter users did not talk to Phelps-Roper like she was a heartless monster, but rather a human being with dignity and value.

After I listened to Phelps-Roper’s talk, I was grateful that she had left Westboro in 2012, not in 2021. She was an active Twitter user before Gamergate, #MeToo, and the 2016 U.S. presidential election. If she had been tweeting the same vitriol from her Westboro days in our current political climate, would anyone have taken an interest in the person behind the profile? Wouldn’t she have been “cancelled”?

The rise of cancel culture

From its origin in the 1981 song “Your Love is Cancelled” by Nile Rodgers & Chic, the phrase “cancel culture” has evolved. “Cancellation” is no longer merely a personal choice to not engage with a person due to an offensive statement or action. It has now become a public reckoning (and often condemnation) of a person’s reputation, personal life, and body of work. Something that could be understood as a mistake or misunderstanding in an in-person setting turns into a rhetorical grenade, dividing those involved into “us” and “them.” Moreover, in many cases, this rage spirals into harassment and threats against the person who is cancelled.

Participants in cancel culture will often defend their takedowns of the person they’re canceling as accountability. However, as Catholics, we already know that we’re responsible for our actions: “Freedom is the power, rooted in reason and will, to act or not to act, to do this or that, and so to perform deliberate actions on one's own responsibility” (CCC 1731). If taking responsibility for one’s actions was all that the “cancellers” required, there would be no cancel culture.

Oftentimes, cancel culture participants will also demand that the cancelled person “face the consequences” of their perceived wrongdoings, which usually consist of the loss of followers, titles, or other marks of success. Again, Catholics believe actions have consequences, and that “the wages of sin is death” (Rom 6:23). We also know that an apology is sometimes (but not always) insufficient to repair the damage done by sin (CCC 1459).

The Catholic alternative to cancel culture

But here’s the difference between Catholicism and cancel culture: forgiveness and recognizing the dignity of the human person. Forgiveness doesn’t mean a lack of justice, but rather an acknowledgment of each other as human beings made in the image and likeness of God. Forgiveness is not a “get out of jail free” card - it’s the restoration of a relationship.

As Phelps-Roper said in her TED talk, 
My friends on Twitter didn’t abandon their beliefs or their principles, only their scorn. They channeled their infinitely justifiable offense and came to me with pointed questions tempered with kindness and humor. They approached me as a human being, and that was more transformative than two full decades of outrage, disdain, and violence.

In our conversations online and in person, let us place human dignity above our pride. After all, Jesus didn’t come to earth to “cancel” humanity because of the Pharisees, but to reconcile us to himself (Col 1:19-22).

It’s back to school time, which means getting back into the swing of things for teachers, students, and parents. It’s a time to reset schedules, restart routines, and relearn the rules, policies, and procedures that will guide the next ten months. As a teacher at a new school learning the policies in the handbook, I am reminded of the New York Times article about a Catholic school teacher, Victoria Crisitello, who was fired “because she was pregnant and unmarried” - and who has been in a seven-year long legal battle over the firing. 

This is one case of many that have made news in recent years in which a Catholic school employee was fired for extramarital sex and pregnancy or for same-sex marriage. These situations raise questions regarding religious liberty and workplace discrimination, which then play out on the national stage.

However, a more relevant question for everyday conversation over these cases may be this: Where is the line between the culture and behavioral standards of an institution and its lived experience by its members?

When thinking about these particular cases involving the relationship between maintaining a Catholic moral code and the visibility of the sinfulness of its employees, here are a few ideas to consider.

Pro-life in Name Only?

A question that came to mind as I followed Victoria Crisitello’s case was this: What does it mean to live in an authentically pro-life way? As Catholics, we believe that life begins at conception, no matter how that conception occurred. Is it a pro-life move to fire a teacher and remove her only source of income to care for her unborn child? Where was the support for this woman who chose to keep her baby? As we discuss policies and moral codes, we cannot forget the woman and what she needs in order to care for the child that we believe deserves life within her. 

Visible and Invisible Sin

A line that stood out to me in the New York Times piece was from Ms. Crisitello’s attorney: “Because the school’s only proof of a violation of its morals code was the pregnancy itself, ‘only a woman could be punished, not a man.” A male teacher could be equally in violation of a school’s moral code that upholds the importance of reserving sex for marriage, but the school would never know, even if a pregnancy resulted.

How can an institution hold fair expectations based on certain values when the measure of those values is not always visible? Maybe the line is the possibility of repentance from a mistake in moral judgement versus a sustained and persistent lifestyle. In the case of Ms. Crisitello, what if this was a one-time mistake? It’s possible that she could be truly penitential and have already received absolution through the sacrament of Confession. 

Another thing to consider with these cases, and what is often at the heart of the decisions made by Church institutions, is the possibility of scandal. Within a Catholic context, scandal is when one’s actions lead others to wrongdoing or sinful behavior. Oftentimes, the thought is that if Catholics schools or parishes appear to condone what is considered a sinful behavior or lifestyle, then this may lead others to believe that behavior or lifestyle to be okay within the Church and, therefore, possibly lead others into sinful behavior. Distancing oneself from the possibility of scandal due to a member’s actions should, however, never cross the line to judging the state of that person’s soul.  

In any case, these distinctions still leave open the question of how we respond to sinful action that can be seen, and therefore judged, and how we respond to sin that remains hidden from human eyes.

A Church of Mercy

Pope Francis often reminds us that the Church is called to bring God’s mercy into the world. When these policies lead to immediate termination, little room may be left for mercy or forgiveness between the institution and the employee. While there are certain actions that warrant immediate termination (such as any confirmed abuse of a minor) other actions like a one-time breaking of a policy might call for more reflection.

How should Catholic institutions balance serving as models of Christian living with the call to mercy and reconciliation? The answer is probably left to be determined on a case-to-case basis, as the opportunities for repentance may look differently depending on the variables involved. However, the call remains to be good models of Christ’s own mercy in the world. Pope Francis’ invitation is often one of erring on the side of mercy, of remembering that we are all sinners, and of encouraging dialogue with those who have failed us. This call goes beyond that of employees in Catholic institutions and can apply to all workplaces and relationships. Pope Francis advises that “situations can change; people can change. Be the first to seek to bring good. Do not grow accustomed to evil, but defeat it with good.”

May we be encouraged in all aspects of life to move towards a posture of mercy in our interactions with others. Let this also serve as a reminder that we too must examine what in our own lives may be invisible, but still harmful, so that we are moved to seek repentance.

I didn’t wear makeup for eight years. Yep, you read that right. It’s not because I didn’t love makeup. I do! I was really into beauty and fashion in high school and even dabbled in the modeling industry. The reason why I didn’t touch a mascara brush for nearly a decade is because I felt God calling me to discern consecrated life and I lived in a religious community for 8 years. All of that meant no money, no fashionable clothes and - you guessed it - no makeup.

It was a freeing experience for me. Have you ever looked at a group of young religious sisters and thought, “Wow, they are glowing!” There is an intangible “something” that makes these women glow.

When I lived in a religious community, each morning I woke up, got ready in twenty minutes, and was in the chapel with the rest of my community. We prayed for an hour, had Mass together, and started the day. I didn’t worry about the latest fashions or beauty trends, and this freed up my heart for a deep friendship with Jesus and a conviction of His love for me. In letting my hands fall open, He filled them with deep interior freedom, a habit of prayer, and mission experiences all over the world.

Fast forward to 2020, yoga pants, and five-day-old hair. I wasn’t wearing makeup for other (less-freeing) reasons, and you know them. I don’t need to rehash our pandemic experiences here.

Trying to find an outlet during the pandemic, I took up the idea of exploring the creative side of makeup. I also learned more about how to properly use makeup and find a skin care routine that made me feel amazing in my own skin. Whatever 2020 threw at me, I had a five-minute makeup routine in the morning and a five-minute skin care ritual at night. These routines reminded me to be attentive to treating myself with dignity during a stressful season and to focus on what I could control.

So, here we are in 2021. In some parts of the country, masks are coming off and the world is seeing your face for the first time in 18 months. If revitalizing your skincare and makeup routine is something that will be rejuvenating for you in this season, here are some tips for where to begin:

1. Start with a good canvas.

Your makeup game cannot be a 10 if your skin care is a 2. Period. I’ve learned a lot from French women in this way. Their makeup is natural and looks effortless. The reason they can pull off French minimalism is because they focus on the body’s largest organ and prioritize skincare. Take time to work with someone who can help you find a good regimen and your makeup will be more about accentuating your natural beauty, less about caking on product to cover blemishes and scarring.

2. Commit to a “Core 4.”

Makeup is all about layering. I recommend that women find four core products that they can apply in minutes. For example, I usually start with a tinted moisturizer with skin care benefits, a well-matched concealer to hide discoloration, a brow product, and a creamy blusher that also serves as a lip and shadow color. This creates a beautiful monochromatic look that can easily become a daily habit. Take some time to find your quick “signature look.” You may find yourself  more confident and productive after you start applying this every day.

3. Add your “extras” to glam up when you want it.

For me, these are a lengthening mascara, a little eyeliner applied to the top of my lid line and hugging the inner low lid, and a bold lipstick that makes me feel like I can conquer the world. Each woman can find what works for her and makes her feel her best.

There are certain days where I still choose to not wear makeup, and I love that I can feel confident in my own skin. This is my goal for you, as well. I love hearing friends say that they feel confident and peaceful without having to wear makeup because they focus on these beauty basics.

I get to spend a lot of time with moms and people who want to be moms. As a PhD candidate writing her dissertation on transitions into motherhood, I’ve spent two years closely following 84 women on their motherhood journeys. As a birth and bereavement doula and childbirth educator, I’ve walked with couples through preparing for, welcoming, and even saying goodbye to their children – and through waiting for a child who never came.

And do you know what the main message I’ve heard in the past year and a half has been?: “I don’t know if I can do this.” 

The COVID Baby Bust

As mom to a 15-month-old coronial (baby born during the pandemic), I totally get it. Whatever semblance of a “child-raising village” that American culture encouraged pre-pandemic was stripped down by COVID. And because of gender roles in our society, this unbelievable burden falls heavily on the shoulders of mothers.

One general principle of parenthood is that overburdened moms aren’t eager to become moms again. All of the ways that the pandemic attacked parental support impacts whether women plan to have babies, now or ever. In 2020 and 2021, nearly all of those same women I had interviewed in 2019 mentioned putting off trying to have kids – some even saying that the stress of the pandemic had convinced them to lessen the number of children they had hoped or planned to have. Each one of them talked about fear of a lack of support or community as a driving factor in this decision. 

This is reflective of what the media has recently termed the “COVID baby bust.” Remember back when lots of pundits thought that staying at home would result in more babies? What we actually are seeing is the opposite. According to my research and that of others, this is because people usually don’t try to conceive babies when they’re stuck at home together; they try to conceive when they are confident that they will have the social support and material resources they need to parent well. 

Creating a new normal post-pandemic gives us the opportunity to form individual and societal habits that provide needed support and resources, but we have a long way to go.

Concrete Ways We Can Help

One way that we can help is by finding an institution that could better support moms and help them step up. 

As a sociologist, I often look for how institutions impact someone’s individual “choices” (or perceived lack thereof) - and I see a lot of room for growth in how our institutions can support moms. If your workplace doesn’t have maternity, miscarriage, or stillbirth leave, start a petition for them to institute it. If your church has a culture where people glare at moms of screaming children (or worse, a culture where moms and children don’t even show up), ask those moms what you can do to make them feel more supported. 

We can also make a goal to show up for moms in little ways. You can do something as simple as bringing a meal to a family or buying a box of diapers for your local women’s care center. To lend some emotional support, ask a mom friend about how motherhood is going for her and really listen. Listening to her is, in and of itself, an act of beauty and justice - and it might also help you understand how best to pray for her and address the systemic problems at play.

"Momming" is hard - and momming in a pandemic is even harder. As we reshape our societal norms and individual habits, I encourage you to make sure moms and moms-to-be know that you have their back. It’s a lot easier to decide to raise a child if you know that you have a supportive village.

I will be the first to admit that I have the potential to be an insufferable human being. Sure, I try not to be – don’t we all? Personally, it can feel as though it would be shockingly easy to become difficult: self-centered, thoughtless of other people’s needs and desires, and holding onto an iron-clad opinion that everything should go my way. This potential to become difficult is something I always come back to when I contemplate having roommates.

I am 28 years old and I have a roommate. Throughout my twenties, I've had multiple roommates. During these various living arrangements, I’ve been closer to certain roommates than others. I am fortunate that I currently live with someone who I call one of my best friends. When we moved in together during the lockdown period of COVID-19, I was worried that so much time together would have a negative impact on our friendship. What I found instead has been a wonderful call to fellowship and community. I hope to live with my current roommate for some time to come, until a big life change rips us asunder. 

Living in community has taught me about grace, emotional flexibility, and conscientiousness. With my roommate, I share my biggest triumphs and my deepest despairs. We negotiate kitchen organization and living room arrangements. We eat dinner together and complain about work. We learn what it means to consider another person’s comfort, even if it means not exactly getting our way. She keeps me honest about my tendency to leave dishes in the sink.

Especially during this past year of living, working, and being in each other’s main pandemic friend circles, we have worked hard to ensure that we both have some necessary space balanced with loving fellowship. I am thankful that a year of sharing our lives so completely has been a positive experience. This is not to say everything has been easy: I have way too many books scattered about our apartment and she has a predilection for large kitchen appliances that barely fit into our kitchen space.

Although, I do love that food processor.

On the one hand, I could say that living with a roommate is preparing me for marriage. Learning how to live with another person and honoring their different way of doing things seems like an essential marriage lesson. On the other hand, I don’t believe that this relationship is about preparing for something that may or may not happen one day.

Ultimately, by living with a roommate, I must constantly practice loving another person deeply and consistently. I practice how to set good boundaries and how to communicate them effectively. I practice hard conversations and giving feedback lovingly. I also practice receiving feedback gracefully and openly. If I lived alone, I wouldn't be able to practice these essential relationship skills in the same way.

As I write this, I am grieving the end of a romantic relationship. Sitting beside me is the Starbucks coffee and homemade blueberry muffin that my roommate surprised me with to comfort me. Later today, I'm joining her at Mass to pray together.‍

Having a roommate has been an opportunity to appreciate another person's differences and to compromise as an act of love. It’s a chance to go out of my way to care for someone when they are down, and to celebrate them when they are high. It’s a way to allow myself to love and be loved.

Have you heard about graves being found at residential schools in Canada and wondered what the Catholic Church has to do with any of it?

You are in wide company, as knowledge of Native history and experience in both the U.S. and Canada has a long way to go. Native people have experienced long and complicated relations with Catholicism and the Catholic Church. Residential schools in Canada and boarding schools in the U.S. were a key part of the assimilation strategy from the mid-19th century, the central idea of which was to break the connections of Native children with their people and culture. Survivors of the schools have spoken for years about the harms witnessed there and have attested to the presence of more burial sites.

Christian practice was mandatory at boarding schools and residential schools, including government-run schools. Because of this, it is generally not helpful to try and lessen the historical impact of Catholicism in the genocidal actions of these schools. The ideas propagated by the Church planted the seeds, no matter who ended up listed as administrator.

In both Canada and the U.S. the road to the boarding school strategy of assimilation was laid centuries before the first boarding school was created - and the Doctrine of Discovery lies at the root. The Doctrine of Discovery refers to a host of documents, but is mostly associated with the final papal bull Inter Caetera. Beginning in the 1100s, various papal bulls and decrees built up the idea of religious territorial sovereignty. Then came Romanus Pontifex (1455) and Inter Caetera (1493). These papal bulls authorized the enslavement of local people and the Christian domination and superiority in "discovered" lands. The damage of spiritual justification for policies that advanced white supremacy cannot be overstated.

Prior reports in Canada estimated that 6,000 children died at residential schools, with only about 4,100 identified. We have since learned that this number is far too low. Newer estimates say 15,000 children died at residential schools. The Truth and Reconciliation Commission (TRC) in Canada was meant to issue a comprehensive report on residential schools in Canada. Yet, so far, over 1,000 unidentified graves have been found at residential schools that are not included in the TRC’s final report - and these numbers could still be too low. The U.S. has never compiled nationwide statistics.

In June 2021, Secretary of the Interior Deb Haaland (Laguna Pueblo) announced a Federal Indian Boarding School Initiative: "The primary goal will be to identify boarding school facilities and sites; the location of known and possible student burial sites located at or near school facilities; and the identities and Tribal affiliations of children interred at such locations."

Many records are held by private entities, like Catholic religious orders, and are unavailable to tribes, families, and researchers. Without these records, it is difficult to impossible to understand daily conditions at the schools or identify the bodies found - preventing return to their people and family. It is unclear what actions can be taken when a religious order refuses to turn over records, but such protective measures further damage trust in institutional justice.

Also in June 2021, the Canadian Conference of Catholic Bishops (CCCB) announced a “delegation of Indigenous people to meet with the Holy Father to foster meaningful encounters of dialogue and healing” in December 2021. Individual delegations of First Nations, Métis, and Inuit will meet with Pope Francis before a final audience all together on December 20th. A letter to Indigenous people in 2018 stated, “After carefully considering the request and extensive dialogue with the Bishops of Canada, [Pope Francis] felt that he could not personally respond” to formal calls for a papal apology. The 2021 meeting would be a great opportunity for Pope Francis to lead the way in public, personal, and repeated apology and acknowledgement of the centuries of harm done to Native peoples.

Native people are not a monolith - individuals, families, bands, tribes, and nations have all experienced boarding or residential schools in their own unique way. But we all can come together to seek justice for those lost, and to advocate for honesty and healing without platitudes. Harms to and ignorance of Native experience has stretched for generations. It will likely take many more generations to come to terms with our full history as a Church, country, and people.

But what a gift to be invited to take up that torch and carry it forward. Find out whose land it is where you live, work, and pray. In the U.S., you can learn from and support the National Native American Boarding School Healing Coalition. This is an opportunity for all of us to bring knowledge into our parish and community and let more light in.

The COVID-19 pandemic took a serious toll on our dating lives. If you were going on dates, FaceTime and the internet became pretty much the only option. If you were dating but not living together, even living a mere block away could bring the challenges of a long-distance relationship. Yet, we adapted — and, I think, even became better daters.

In March 2020, when the lockdowns first began, I had been in a serious relationship for just over a year. We stayed together throughout the pandemic and we’re now engaged. As I reflect on the development of my relationship, I believe the pandemic prepared us for marriage in three key ways. 

1. We put more effort and intention into spending time together.

Before the pandemic, it was so easy to go to a movie or a restaurant for date night. Trying to make our time together special while many of our usual date spots were closed required much effort and planning. For many months during the pandemic, the most we could do for dates was go on long walks - but those walks led to fruitful discussions about ourselves and the future. We began reading 101 Questions to Ask Before You Get Engaged by H. Norman Wright, which gave a new intentionality to our conversations.

Also, the time alone to focus on our relationship was so valuable. As an extrovert, I can get distracted by my desire to build as many relationships as possible. But when my fiancé was one of the few people I saw regularly for months, I was able to slow down and truly discern where God was calling our relationship to go.

2. We learned to speak other love languages.

Early on in our relationship, my fiancé and I took the Five Love Languages quiz, created by Gary Chapman. A marriage counselor and Baptist pastor, Chapman identifies five distinct “languages” of expressing love: physical touch, acts of service, words of affirmation, gift giving, and quality time.

Physical touch is my and my fiancé's primary love language. So, during lockdown, we had to rely on our secondary love languages. I sent him encouraging texts every morning; he called me on FaceTime in the evenings. This time apart taught us how to love each other in multiple ways and how to communicate when our needs aren’t being met.

3. I took ownership over my own faith journey.

I’ll be honest: Staying inside for months straight didn’t fix my prayer life. So much of my spiritual life revolves around community and going to Mass.

One of the biggest lies I believed as a single person was that finding a religiously committed boyfriend would automatically make my faith stronger. My fiancé is a fiercely devout Catholic, and has inspired me to grow in my faith over the course of our relationship. But it's not our relationship with God that will be weighed and judged, it will be my own. Learning to take ownership over my spiritual life (even if it differs from my fiancé’s) has been extremely important for my vocation.

Even in the midst of a heartbreaking and challenging year, I’m thankful that I received the grace to grow closer to the man I love and strengthen our relationship.

For our first “A Day in the Life” series, we welcome Sarah Daniels, a Business Development Engineer based in Tampa, FL. I talked with Sarah about her journey as an engineer and the role her faith plays in her workday. 

Why did you become interested in the Construction Management industry? What does a day at work look like for you?

I always enjoyed walking through open houses and riding my bike through new neighborhoods as a little girl. I even remember having a notebook in middle school where I would draw all of my custom home designs. Construction and interior design have always interested me. As college was approaching, I wanted to study either architecture, civil engineering, or entrepreneurship. Regardless of what I ended up studying, I had the same end goal to be around construction, knowing there are several avenues of our business.

The best part of this industry is that no one day is exactly the same. For example, some roles are out of an office whereas others are on a construction site. Prior to moving to Tampa, I spent nearly two years working at the United States Capitol in an engineering role. We were constructing a new museum for the Capitol Visitor Center. My primary role on this project was to make sure that the project got “built on paper” before being physically built. I interacted with our trade partners on site, assisted with monthly billing, and coordinated the fabrication and installation of museum exhibits. Now, in my new role as a Business Development Engineer, I secure contracts for our company.

What are some of your hobbies outside of your workday?

Outside of work, my hobbies include playing golf, tennis, running, hiking, biking, and spending time at the beach - basically anything outdoors! I’m also relearning the piano and am active in the music ministry at my church here in Tampa. I absolutely love serving the church through music and I sing in the choir for our contemporary Mass every Sunday.

How do you find purpose in your career?

I find purpose through my career in many ways: through the friendships, professional relationships, and completed projects that we construct. It’s rewarding to see your efforts and eventually your final project serve both local and national audiences. For example, I’ve worked on a healthcare facility for the United States Naval Academy, a historic building in the Georgetown neighborhood of Washington, DC that we converted into a bank branch for JPMorgan Chase, and a museum at the United States Capitol.

How do you integrate your faith in your career or how do you see them relating to one another?

Integrating faith into my career is tricky. In our industry, we are often up wildly early and work late, so it was important for me to find a way to spend time with God each day. I discovered that starting my day with Christian music when I’m getting ready and during my commute helps me to reflect on how grateful I am before my professional day even begins. Furthermore, I firmly believe that as Christians it is important to spread kindness and God’s love in all that we do. On my project sites, I always try to go the extra mile by addressing each of our trade partners by name in the morning, as well as asking them about themselves or their families. I find that once I do this, it brings the human part of our business to light before diving into conversation about the progress of construction activities on site. I am confident that our trade partners, our designers, our clients, and my colleagues can attest to the positive environment I strive to create on any team that I’m a part of.

What is one piece of advice for a young woman who’s considering a career in Construction Management and/or Engineering?

Be bold. Be confident. Be you. Always be the hardest worker in the room and don’t stop running after your goals until you catch them. I recommend that young women spend time learning the industry through independent reading. Also, never be afraid to ask questions. There are so many people out there who value the opportunity to share their knowledge and experiences, so capitalize on that and then pay it forward. Lastly, I would emphasize the importance of practicing and always striving to improve both oral and written communication skills, as well as understanding the details of the contract for any given project. 

What is your go-to motivational quote?

My forever go-to favorite verse is Philipians 4:6 which tells us: “Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God.” I find comfort in this verse because I’ve always been an over-thinker and struggle with not dwelling on decisions or situations. This verse reminds me to surrender my uncertain thoughts to the Lord, as His plan is by far better than anything I could ever imagine.

Sarah grew up in The Woodlands, TX and studied Entrepreneurship at The University of Tampa. Upon graduating, she moved to Washington, DC to start her career with Turner Construction Company. While at Turner, Sarah completed a Master of Science degree in Real Estate and Infrastructure from Johns Hopkins University and earned a Business Law Certificate from Cornell University’s School of Law. Sarah is currently 27 years old and still works for Turner from their Tampa office.

The world tunes into the Olympics to watch athletes demonstrate their strength. Simone Biles, beloved by many as the GOAT, made headlines during the Tokyo 2020 games not for her stunning athleticism - but rather, for her strength of character. 

Biles has been open about her Catholic faith, and we can see it on display in more than just the rosary she carries in her gym bag. Through her words and actions, Biles embodies a number of Catholic values. For example, in deciding to step back from the team final and let her teammates take over, she demonstrated humility. And in speaking openly about her mental health struggles, she exhibited courage.

Another of the values we see consistently in Biles is solidarity. St. John Paul II wrote, “[Solidarity] is not a feeling of vague compassion or shallow distress at the misfortunes of so many people, both near and far. On the contrary, it is a firm and persevering determination to commit oneself to the common good; that is to say, to the good of all and of each individual, because we are all really responsible for all” (Sollicitudo rei Socialis, no. 38).

Solidarity with her teammates

One of Biles’ clearest displays of solidarity was in her support for her teammates at the Olympics. After withdrawing from the competition, she could have chosen to retreat to her hotel room, away from the prying eyes of TV cameras. Instead, she put on her warm-up suit and cheered on her teammates from the sidelines. In doing so, she prioritized solidarity with her teammates over her own personal comfort.

Biles’ support for her fellow gymnasts goes deeper than cheering from the stands. A few years ago, gymnast Jordan Chiles was on the verge of quitting the sport, fed up with overbearing coaches who criticized her hair and body and restricted her food intake. Biles stepped in, inviting Chiles to move across the country and train with her at the World Champion Centre (WCC), the gym she and her parents own. There, Chiles bounced back and learned to love the sport again, eventually earning a spot on the 2020 Olympic team. 

Chiles was surprised when she arrived to see so many Black gymnasts in one place. Indeed, nearly all the WCC’s elite gymnasts are women of color, giving the younger gymnasts plenty of diverse role models. "Representation matters," Biles said, "I think the kids can see that, and the little ones in the gym are always trying to talk to us because they see the similarities."

Solidarity with abuse victims

Biles has been an outspoken critic of abuse within the gymnastics world. She came forward as one of trainer Larry Nassar’s abuse victims, and she has consistently put pressure on the sport’s governing body, USA Gymnastics, to ensure that it never happens again. Her criticisms led to the closure of the Karolyi Ranch, the now-notorious training center where Olympic hopefuls were reportedly subjected to physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. 

The closure is a step in the right direction, but it’s still not enough for Biles. She has said that she wouldn’t let a future daughter of hers compete under USA Gymnastics until there is greater accountability and safeguards to prevent future abuse.

In the meantime, though, Biles is creating the environment she desires at her family gym. The WCC is staffed by handpicked coaches who value their athletes’ physical and mental health. Biles’ gym also prioritizes athlete safety. While some other gyms discourage parents from watching practice, the WCC includes a parent observation room. All parts of the gym are clearly visible to observers, making it harder to hide abuse.

A shining example

Asked if she feels obligated to speak out about social issues, Biles said, “Personally, for me, I don’t think of it as an obligation. I think of it as an honor to speak for the less fortunate and for the voiceless.”

Through her words and actions, Biles is a shining example of Catholic solidarity, demonstrating her firm and persevering determination to commit herself to the common good of all within the gymnastics world. While very few of us are able to replicate her gymnastics moves, we can all follow her example and practice solidarity with those in our own lives.

Hannah Reikowsky worked with Mary Grace Gorman on this piece.